


Don't Let Me Crumble

by Spoon_Killer97



Series: We Are Alike... [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Anger, Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hidden Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, M/M, Protective Alec Lightwood, Stressed Magnus Bane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-23 15:03:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14335047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spoon_Killer97/pseuds/Spoon_Killer97
Summary: Magnus is under a great amount of stress and things had been going wrong for the whole week. He needs a break and his boyfriend, to stop crying and crumbling because of the situation. Alec is more that willing to help him with his embrace.





	Don't Let Me Crumble

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! So I turned this into a series because is the second time I do this. Ok so, this fic started as a way to relieve the stress I was feeling some weeks ago; my life wasn't going well, I got into a job on vacations with one of my cousins and when the semester started I had less time to work, so that got us into fights and some other unpleasant situations; I fought with my boy best friend (who is just a friend at this point) because of his boyfriend, and some other things that actually suck, including the fact that I think I'm failing the semester again.
> 
> So, basically I felt useless and like I didn't had anywhere to go because everyone has expectations and a vision of me that I "have to keep" so, like Magnus I come across people like really strong but I'm actually sensitive and a little weak. So, this time I poured myself into the warlock.
> 
> I'm way better now and finally could finish this (since life kicked me and didn't even let me finish it when I first started it) and post it. So here it is, ready to be read. Enjoy, I guess?

The bottle of potion slipped from Magnus’ hand and fell into the floor with a loud crash. The purple smoke dispersed while the liquid stained the carpet.

“Fucking shit!” Magnus screamed as the last remnant of patience went through the window.

His cat eyes shone bright golden while his hands produced dangerous orange magic. He turned around and used that magic against the room. A pulse went through it and the furniture was sent to the walls, something broke, a lightbulb exploded and the ingredients he kept fell from their closet; thankfully Magnus had a spell against broken glass so nothing went out of its jar.

After his magic canalized his anger he fell into his knees, it wasn’t the potion’s fault, Magnus had been having a shitty week. Somehow everything he did was going wrong, he made the potions bad, there were unhappy clients, his cat was in a mood of constant hate towards him and he was incredibly busy.

The Clave was trying to improve relationships with the downworld, which sounded like a very good idea when they first proposed it to them. But that meant they had to meet with new discussions and ideas to try to get to a good point.

At first, Magnus was very motivated by the project, but as the days went by, he had lost the motivation. They weren’t getting anywhere and the constant meeting had him wasting a lot of time too. He didn’t wanted to quit it, he wasn’t at that point yet, but he didn’t felt the same way he did when he started.

And frankly, he hadn’t been doing the work for the project very well either, so he was just a big mess.

As he knelt in the middle of the room, tears started running down his face. He wasn’t sad or depressed, he was frustrated and overwhelmed. It has been a while since the last time cried out of pure stress.

The tears lasted for some moments, he felt drained, useless and incompetent. The pressure in his chest because of the amount of stress, hurting him. He tried to clean his tears and began organizing the room, picking up the fallen jars and trying to fix the furniture.

In that moment the front door of the loft clicked open startling him.

“Magnus, I’m home,” Alec said as he venture inside looking for his boyfriend. Magnus cleaned his tears and tried to compose himself quickly just as Alec turned in the door to spot him in the room.

The second the Shadowhunter saw the state of the room, he frowned.

“What happened here?” he asked with so much concern it made Magnus flinch. “Were you attacked, are you okay?”

Magnus turned around to face him with a smile that didn’t reached his eyes.

“Oh yeah, darling, it’s quite alright. Just the potion I was making fell from my fingers and leaved the room in this state. Nothing a little bit of magic can’t fix.” As if to prove his point, Magnus moved his hands and clicked his fingers to fix the whole room in one go.

His magic protested. Lately, it also has been very sensitive with his feelings. So right now, just as Magnus wasn’t feeling like doing anything and just crying himself to sleep, his magic was wanting the same.

Alec was still frowning from where he was standing. He looked around for a moment before settling his eyes back on Magnus.

“And did the potion made you cry too?” He finally asked. The warlock made a surprise sound.

“What?” he asked in a breath. Alec finally walked in until he was standing in front of Magnus.

“I have seen you cry before, I know what your crying face is like; even if you try to clean up your tears the second I’m near you.” The last part sounded hurt and Magnus could just lower his gaze. _Great, he was being a bad boyfriend too._

As if sensing his predicament Alec sighed and soften his voice.

“Magnus, are you okay? You’ve been acting weird this past weeks. You’ve been snapping more at people and frankly you… You look unhappy.”

“I’m fine, Alexander,” the warlock answered with a tone that wasn’t even a little convincing, still looking at the floor.

He felt a warm hand cupping his cheek and making him look up to those beautiful eyes he loved. His heart flipped but there was a forming knot in his stomach at the idea of hurting Alec just because he couldn’t handle a little bit of pressure.

For Lilith’s sake, he was 400 years old and he was crying out of stress.

“Look,” Alec started, pulling him out of his thoughts. “I get that you don’t want to talk about it, I really do. But don’t try to hide to me the fact that you’re not feeling well, don’t lie to me about that. Just tell me that you don’t want to talk about it and if there is something I can do to help you.”

Magnus tried to look away again but Alec’s firm press of his hand and the soft stroking of his thumb, kept him in place. He swallowed before speaking.

“I’m not okay,” he said softly. Alec nodded with a slight frown but an understanding face. “And I don’t want to talk about it,” he finished waiting for his boyfriend’s bad reaction.

“Okay,” Alec said after some moments when he realized that Magnus wasn’t going to say anything else. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?”

Magnus' heart jumped in his chest again, Alec's mere presence was enough to ease the pressure he was feeling on his chest. 

Also Alec's acceptance to the fact that he didn't want to talk about it, made the knot in his stomach ease. Sometimes when people cared about you, they kept pushing when you aren’t in a good mood. They keep asking about you because they cared, but sometimes, it was not what you wanted or needed.

But Alexander didn’t, he respected his desire of no talking. He knew that in order to feel better Magnus needed distraction, not focusing.

Magnus was tempted to say that there was something he could do but then he remembered all the things he had to do and frowned in sorrow.

“Actually there is, darling,” he said sadly, feeling the pressure in his chest increasing. “But I’m really busy and I have to give that potion tomorrow and plan the meeting and-“

“Magnus,” Alec interrupted him lowering his hand to take the warlock’s. “If you don’t relax a little, you will, drown in work. We’ll figure latter what to do with the potion and, well, the meeting was cancelled. So, please, take some time for yourself and tell me what can I do.”

Magnus swallowed hard. He was already drowning, but Alec was right, maybe he was busy as hell, but he really needed a break and his boyfriend.

“Can- Can you just… Cuddle me?” Magnus lowered his gaze again, he wasn’t supposed to be the one embarrassed about asking for what he wanted. But he felt weak and vulnerable, and for some reason, he felt like Alec was going to snap at him or made fun of him because of that.

Suddenly he was pulled by his boyfriend’s strong arms and his body crashed against a strong mass of muscles. Alec had just pulled him into one of his protective hugs, a hand on his back and the other softly caressing the back of his head.

Magnus sobbed as the tears came back to his eyes. He pulled his arms around his boyfriend and buried his face on his neck. Just by the gesture he felt the pressure easing, it was easier to breath and the crushing weight he felt on his shoulder loosen up a little.

“You’re okay,” Alec whispered kissing his temple. “Everything is going to be alright and I’ll always be here for you.” Another kiss as Magnus’ soft tears ran down his face. “Let’s get more comfortable and go to bed, I’ll cuddle you for as long as you need.”

Magnus sighed in relief but hugged Alec harder. He felt way better already, Alec had that effect on him. Of course he would never made fun of him, they would always be there for each other.

The hug lasted some more moments until Magnus’ tears stopped again; his magic started responding to Alec and started trying to stabilize and feel better inside of Magnus. After they pulled away, Alec kissed his forehead softly, making the warlock’s heart jump. They went to the bedroom and got into their sleeping clothes before Magnus took off his make up and hair product with better magic.

Alec lied down fist, opening his arms in invitation. Magnus lied then, resting his head on his boyfriend’s chest, under his jaw and snuggling against him as close as possible. The hunter wrapped his arms around him again while softly caressing one of his arms and his hair.

They stayed like that for what seemed like hours. Magnus letting his magic stabilize and his stress go out of his body. He felt way better, he didn’t feel like life was crushing him under pressure anymore; he stopped feeling like there was a black fog in his mind and a pressure on his chest.

He sighed and gave a soft peck to Alec’s chest who didn’t stopped caressing his body soothingly.

“I,” the warlock started saying, his voice a little rough from the silence. He cleared his throat and pushed back the slight insecurity he felt for the words he was about to say. “I want to talk about it now. Can you… Would you… I…”

“I’m listening,” Alec said gently. “Tell me, love.”

Magnus’ heart flipped again at the words. Before he started talking. He told Alec about the great amount of stress he was feeling; how the amount of work and clients were crushing him. He told the hunter about how his job was being a mess, and he had mean clients complaining at him, and how he was doing his jobs wrong.

He told Alec about the fight he had with Catarina over something stupid just because they were both too crushed with work to control their tongues.

Magnus talked and told Alec about the meetings, and the frustration, and the fights, and his bad ideas and about how useless and unworthy he felt. He apologized for trying to hide his feelings from his boyfriend at the end.

The warlock felt all the frustrations again but he also felt the bad feelings leaving his body; he felt better and lighter.

“Oh, Magnus,” Alec said pulling him closer kissing his head. “You don’t need to apologize, I get it, I get that you think that being stressed out is not a reason to emotionally collapse; but it is, I know how you’re feeling and sometimes you can’t handle all of that on your own.”

Magnus sighed and Alec made him rise his head from his chest to look at him straight in the eye with so much love, the warlock felt breathless.

“Know that it doesn’t make you weak, it maybe makes you feel a little vulnerable but that is not a bad thing. I love you, and if you ever need to talk to someone, even if you think it’s stupid, I'm here.”

Magnus closed his eyes and was flooded by a new wave of feelings: love, adoration, relief. Alec smiled softly and caressed his cheek.

“Look at me, beautiful,” the hunter said softly and the warlock opened his eyes again. And when he did Alec talked again, he advised Magnus about everything. He told him to apologize to Catarina, to take less clients, to ask for help. The told Magnus he could take care of some of the things for the meetings so the warlock didn't have to do everything alone; he gave him alternatives for every situation and when he was done, Magnus couldn't help but threw himself at Alec and gave him a soft peck on the lips.

“I love you,” he whispered in an emotional tone. “Thank you for being there, for always helping me, Alexander. You’re my ground when I need you, you take me to heaven but keep me grounded so I don’t loose focus. I love you so much.”

“So you feel better?” Alec asked with a fond smile hugging Magnus again. The warlock nodded. “Good, I’ll always be there for you, no matter what. I love you too, so much and you’re there for me always, you’re my ground and my rock too, the least I can do is give you the same support.”

With that they gave each other another soft kiss and went to sleep. Magnus still had a potion to make, but he’ll figure everything out tomorrow, with his beautiful boyfriend’s help.

**Author's Note:**

> On the past fic, some people told me it helped them or that it was exactly what they needed to read at the time; I posted this one hopping it would help someone too. Thanks for reading.


End file.
